iusedtobeintbs:

modosanai:

‘if the bride and groom would now like to exchange their vows’ the priest says

a, e, i, o, u’ the bride whispers

#with his eyes filling with tears #the groom chokes out a heartfelt ”and sometimes y”

  • person: have you ever ran a marathon
  • me: yeah
  • person: which one
  • me: a movie one

thenemeton:

boys r so weak. boys r some pathetic shit. if u punch me in the boob my boob will still b able to sustain life for a new fuckin human. my boob can sustain the human race. if i kick u boys hard enough in the nuts u will never reproduce. ur genetic line is over bub. one well placed stiletto and u are getting shitty half-assed boners and no babies 4 life. who has the power son. who owns u. girls own u. i own u punk. sit down

moon-roses:

i’m not kidding the worst sound ever is the crack in the voice of a person who is about to cry

raptorific:

Swear to god, some guys are terrified that girls are faking common interests to impress them and act really hostile towards anyone they even SUSPECT of doing such a thing

but then they turn around and fake a whole friendship in the hopes of getting sex out of girls, and get mad at them when it doesn’t work

and they super do not see the irony in that